“Schools, Doctors and Supplements don’t heal children-Parents do” – Dr. Aurore
Finding Your Way Out of the Autistic Spiral
By: Aurore Adamkiewicz, NHD
Author of Beyond Natural Cures
Alot of people have made subtle comparisons between my work and Kaufman’s work the founder of Sonrise (tm). I also continue to get emails about what I think about the Kaufman’s program which has proven to be effective in treating autism. I am very familiar with Kaufman’s work and I have two opinions about it: one positive, one negative. The first is, I appreciate the fact the son rise(tm) program focuses on the psychological aspects of autism (but also merging with bio-medical supplementation and rehearsed educational processing). In this way Kaufman’s work is refreshing and is a needed balance in the treatment of autism. What I don’t like is the simple program they have created is over $2,000 and that is just for the start up of the program. To complete Kaufman’s program one would spend easily over $10,000. This is evidence of autism carpet bagging. I remember feeling both desperate and financially stressed because when my son was autistic we had spent over $100,000 in attempting to heal him. My husband and I sat down with the figures and arrived at this conclusion that: 60% was useless, 30% helped somewhat but not enough for the price paid and the 10% which healed him-also was that which was the most economical. What we are talking about is the healing forces of “attachment therapy,” the most economical and yet most difficult means to healing.
In some ways Kaufman is teaching parents how to become more controlled but scripted parents-is this the best option? Creating scripted parents?I believe the only true way and better way of treating autism and behavioral problems and used this model with my own son, is to:
1) Work with Mother and child simultaneously-increase heartfelt emotions, connections and understanding
2) Using remedial Waldorf education (anthroposophy)-which accomplishes the task of filling the holes in the early childhood intellectual structure.
One of my biggest disagreements with Kaufman and so many others offer is reprogramming either educationally or intellectually. Unfortunately this does not address the autistic child, or any child for that matter, innate and necessary need for human connection. In this light, healing must come from the Mother-because without the rehumanization and reactivation of human emotions into the mother and parent-any healing is just temporary or even scripted.
This accounts for the reason why there will be a significant amount of kids that will be helped only so much and stopped progressing or will revert because of this one important aspect-teaching a dissociative “autistic” way for parents to deal with or handle their children. Kaufman on his autism website getting started page proposes the Mother should handle the child’s anger and emotions by running out of the way and/or showing a dead-numb no reaction on the face. This goes against the work of a doctor whom I follow, respect and utilize her work in my practice Dr. Martha Welch of the book Holding Time. Dr. Welch proved definitively back in the 1980’s that 30% of autism is caused and/or healed by the Mother/child bond.
Dr. Wilhelm Reich, a psychologist and founder of orgonomy, whom I base my own work on, researched autism back in the early 1900s. He showed that children learn these autistic traits from the parents, doctors, and teachers in the first years of life. With all of this information pointing to the Mother/child relationship, it is reasonable to assume that it is us, human-adults, which need to reach out to the children and set the example. All of this information and research is conveniently located in my book Beyond Natural Cures. In light of this, Kaufman’s work is wrong or ineffectual on these two fronts:
1) Repressing children’s emotions-and teaching them to emotionally withdrawal-which they are already doing to an extent
2) Thinking he can side swipe the Mother/child relationship-by using parental replacements, teachers in a clinical setting, and also teaching parents to treat their children methodically and robotically by memorizing laws and dogma and not truly changing the parent’s heart.
His focus is promoting the human computer – educationally. I propose that excess education and intellectualization of early childhood specifically,-has been a very strong factor in forming the parents and children’s lives thereby attributing to the way the parent treats and looks at the child and also giving unrealistic age expectations for the child. The books You are Your Child’s First Teacher by Waldorf educators Rahima Baldwin and Over the Rainbow Bridge by Waldorf educator Barbara Patterson provide an in depth study and explanation of that fact. If autism is to be healed-it can only do so when there is a heartfelt connection-with and through the parent and the parent and child are both able to withstand and allow feelings and emotions themselves.
Take for example the story of Helen Keller and her teacher Ms. Sullivan-her teacher was eventually under much duress, force, upheaval and difficulty was able to sublimate Helen’s parents role, bond with the child and earn her trust-thereby initiating the forces of healing and survival within Helen. While Helen’s illness was physical blindness and deafness-her emotional body had become autistic in nature. She was living in a dark lonely world which her parents unconsciously kept her in. In healing my own son of autism, I believe that Helen’s healing should have come from the parent. Sure, Helen received a miracle but at the expense of letting go of her Mother emotionally and giving up on the Mother/child relationship something every child longs for. The Mother was replaced with the teacher Mrs. Sullivan and while it is not optimal, given the time period and the severe emotional/moral restriction within society at that time-that may have been the only hope. However, we are in a new time period, a new age of healing and a new age of consciousness. We must raise our standards and our hope-and go the extra mile for our children.
We can stop poisoning our children with vaccines, pesticides, anti-biotics and drugs but we must never forget the poison of complacency and parental emotional abandonment which plagues our society today. No special laws, rules, regulations or affirmations will bring the healer out of the parent-and for autistic children-it is hard to believe they would accomplish any of that-or even come close to it-far from home-in a school/clinical setting. I know when my own son was autistic, the greatest strides we made were within our own home when we were getting in touch with our emotional body-and encouraging him to do the same-In all truth, this is where communication comes from,This is where it SHOULD come from…..
Copyright@Beyond Natural Cures 2009
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